Day Five

Good evening, dears. I have nothing beautiful nor inspiring to pass onto you today. In my first two blog posts I almost felt as if I was pouring all the magnificence I had witnessed over this summer from my heart and brain and onto my blog, for it then to be lapped up and digested by my readers. 


However, I feel unable to continue to do this. Although I find such beauty in the world; the way the sun beams through the curtains and the particles of dust you can see floating through the room are like glittering stars watered down so that they can be viewed on earth, or that feeling which floods over you as you wake up on a wonderfully calm day which you know will stretch out and curve like a path before you and offer you so many routes, which when taken, will lead you to so many new and exciting possibilities. 


I would love to continue to describe these, but I am finding it increasingly difficult. You see, there are certain things I wish to keep to myself. I want to explain what deep meanings I gain from observing the reflection of a clear blue sky dotted with clouds in a puddle beneath my feet, however I feel I would be opening myself up too much. I promise to give you a snippet of these thoughts each day, but I don't want to allow you to see too much of me.


I fear I have opened my heart up too willingly to complete strangers, complete strangers who do not even reply to what I write and instead just read it and continue on with their lives (which I love, don't get me wrong) and someday you will see me for who I am entirely, and that scares me so much.


Today my short snippet will be about my train journey today. Without giving away too much about where I live, I was on a train from a town close to my home, journeying towards Windsor. My town isn't the prettiest of places, in fact it is often described as a 'bomb site'. Lovely, I know. As the train slowly glided away from the train station and tucked itself away into the folds of greenery, I was lost in how suddenly the world I was so used to disappeared.


The moment the train had crawled out of the station I felt a sense of adventure tingle through my veins. The tracks are hidden under thick trees and bushes, almost like a tunnel which, once you have passed through, will reveal the secrets of the universe beyond the tiny world of my town that I am so used to.


The moment the train emerged from the green tunnel, leaving pollen fluttering behind it, sparkling in the sunlight, the secrets of the universe dazzled every passenger on the train. The carriage fell silent. The castle, bathed in the blazing midday sun, stood proud among the fields which were such a bright green that I took a moment to wonder if I had ever seen something so evidently alive and crisp and sharp. Beyond the rickety tracks upon the train was moving, not a person was to be seen. Not a living soul other than the trees which, if the windows had been open, I was sure you would have been able to hear whisper to one another in the summer breeze. 


In awe of the sights around me, I let out a breath, which again if the windows had been open would have followed the whispering murmurs of the trees in a quiet, rustling song and nature would harmonize with the humans who have been so dragged away from the origins of their life. Windsor Castle greeted the passengers and posed for pictures as tourists steadied their cameras as they clambered to get a better shot. 


The train soon came to a halt, the doors opened, and noticing we were in the centre of human life: shops, restaurants and pavements, the enchantment and discovery trickled from my mind and I continued on with a normal shopping trip. 


Sometimes I wish moments, like the one I witnessed on the train, could be captured not only in videos and pictures but also within my mind. I don't have the best of memories, and therefore I have illustrated that moment within my blog, so not only myself but others can share the beauty of a journey I have been on. Oddly enough, that journey relates back to what I mentioned earlier, "a wonderfully calm day which you know will stretch out and curve like a path before you and offer you so many routes, which when taken, will lead you to so many new and exciting possibilities". I realise now that that is exactly what the train I was on experienced today. I feel almost sorry for the train as it must observe this beautiful transition from my town to Windsor on such a regular basis that it has become boring and tedious, however I realise the train must relish in watching its passengers grasp and claw at the raw beauty before their eyes.


I think I have far overstayed my welcome on blogger today, and will therefore leave you with that odd little metaphor. I hope you have discovered something as magical as what I discovered today, or if not will do soon. Good night.


Ayesha x


(P.S. This has not been edited and I am too lazy to read through it, so I will do in the morning. My apologies for any grammar or spelling mistakes.)